Well, folks... CEO Tom Blister was arrested in Turin, Italy. He had drunk a combo of 50 grappa shots and 50 espressos over a 12 hour period and was apprehended by local police early this morning while trying to fornicate with a statue of Garibaldi's horse.
In other company news, editor Ethan Kraputnik and corp comm rep Patty Hanratty were fired for their part in the Blister fiasco.
Woundup.com will now return to previously scheduled programming. Please enjoy.