Do Over

As Yogi Berra once said, "You only get one life, so don't fuck it up." Well, he didn't really say that, but I'm sure he echoed the sentiment at some point during his Hall-of-Fame career behind the dish _ perhaps to Jim Bouton.

If I had to do it all over again, I'd be a baseball play-by-play man for radio. Maybe there's still time, but I don't know how my voice stacks up against the greats...

"We've got a beautiful day for baseball. The Cubs are in their traveling whites: blue socks, blue caps, black shoes. Carlos Zambrano is your pitcher. 6'3" 220 pounds. The big Venezuelan took a beating last week in Oakland and is looking to bounce back. Ronnie, we saw him warming up earlier, and his sinker was really working. Today's pre-game show is brought to you by Ace Hardware. Don't miss the Ace super summer grill sale. Jerry Hairston is leading off today. He has a .388 on-base percentage over the last week. The Cubs have needed a consistent lead-off man. It looks like he might be filling that role. Ronnie, you know a little bit about leading off."

(Ron laughs) "No, Pat. No... I don't."

Maybe I could write Pat Hughes' banter. I dunno...